Slightly Doolally

After three days of “restricted diet” the dreaded bowel cleansing prep began  late  yesterday afternoon. This involved making up two litres of the “stuff ” and leaving it to chill. I think the idea is to give your mouth hypothermia so you don’t taste it. On another blog the taste was described as a mixture of goat spit and industrial drain cleaner! Well it wasn’t – it was much, much, much worse. Words have not yet been invented to truely do justice to just how utterly foul and vomit inducing this stuff really is. You have to force half a pint down every 10 – 15 mins supplemented by another litre of clear liquid. I felt a bit like a balloon being slowly blown up to bursting point.

After a couple of hours the Desired Effect started to take place! The only way I can describe it, is to liken it to a small thermo nuclear device going off somewhere just south of my belly button!!   If I hadn’t been securely fastened to the loo I’m sure I would be seen in the night sky glowing a sickly shade of green.   The after shocks continued until bed time , settled down only to start again this morning. According to the “bumphf” that wasn’t supposed to happen. OH well.

By about noon things had settled down, Steve came home and we set off for the hospital- me very nervous and him being his usual reassuring self. Luckily I was first on the consultant’s list  so had all checks done almost immediately. Next came THE GREAT BIG NEEDLE  in the arm – I am a real wuss when it comes to needles, especially when they look as though they could be used for rug making! Then changed into the very fetching regulation gown with the “little” !!!!??? white bum peeping out, and so into theatre. My consultant was being assisted by a VERY tasty registrar, who, if I was a FEW years younger, unmarried and not lying on my side about to be invaded by a hosepipe, I would definitely have fluttered my eyelashes at.

The various medications were administered into THE GREAT BIG NEEDLE but unlike the last time when I was in cloud cuckoo land until about an hour afterwards , this time I was awake and watched the whole thing on the monitor! VERY STRANGE seeing your insides! He talked me through the whole thing, took a few biopsies, chatted about my disease and best of all reassured me there were no NASTIES lurking round any corner.PHEWWW!

Off to recovery for a wee snooze, then coffee and toast and home.

Just want to say a BIG thankyou to everyone who sent me warm fuzzies. Also to anyone who has to undergo a colonoscopy , try not to worry  – it really isn’t too bad. The diet and prep bit ARE difficult but the procedure itself  is actually the easy bit. You might be lucky and have a dishy doc rummaging about up there!!!!! As Kitty would say “That is all”

This time next week I will be in hospital undergoing a “procedure” !! It involves a camera, and something that resembles a garden hosepipe, being inserted where NOTHING should ever be inserted.  I have several instructions to follow prior to the actual event. Today I have to stop taking my multi vitamin and mineral supplement and from Tuesday I am on a severely restricted diet. NO fruit,veg, salads, nuts, seeds, wholewheat bread pasta rice, and on and on and on!!!  The nasty part of the preparation starts on Thursday but I will let you know how that goes later. Please send me some warm fuzzies to cheer me up.

Was woken up early by Fizz our  demented ginger cat, standing on my pillow, peering at me and “clatting” me with his paw. I got up, fed him and his sister Kizzy,  let them out  and  marvelled at yet another  day of blue skies, little white  fluffy clouds and HEAT! Had I somehow been transported to the Caribbean – maybe I had been swapped with Francie who lives in Anguilla. But no, with the arrival of Stephen growling for breakfast I was definitely still at home in Ireland. What to do with such a beautiful day. After much deliberation I came to the conclusion there was only one thing to do – lots of absolutely nothing!  Difficult as it was , I somehow managed to sunbathe, chat to the neighbours, contemplate joining their kids in the paddling pool, have a litle drinkie or two, water my thirsty plants and then enjoy a delicious meal cooked by my darling HOTS. What more could a woman ask for?

Today was absolutely glorious , blue skies , warm sunshine and a little dancing breeze so I decided to do some gardening for my lovely Mum in law, Isobel. She has artificial knees, is in her ” golden years ” and can’t  bend down  to do her garden any more. I  spent four hours re-shaping  her front lawn, weeding all the flower beds, tidying up the shrubberies,  putting in some new perennials , stabilising her new ” wild bird activity centre” ie.  a multi feeder/bath edifice and have now collapsed on the sofa. I think maybe I did a wee bit too much and I now ache in places I didn’t know I had places!  But it does look good and she is very pleased with it.  Only the back garden to do now. The forecast is for rain coming in so it might have to wait a while.

It’s been a wee while since I shared my thoughts with anyone daft enough to be interested so here goes. HOTS and I went to Paul and Lynne’s wedding last weekend where I was ambushed by a bottle of wine (or more ?) on the Friday night. I know I had a great time and was really pleased to meet Mrs Wild Bill Buchan, Mrs Courgettes-Coates,  Mr & Mrs Lego, The Woowars with their adorable twins and Ms Far Too Good Looking with the figure to die for who lives on the island in the sun and sees dolphins and sting rays and if she wasn’t so nice I would really, really hate her!!! OH jealousy is a terrible thing. Seriously though it was good to meet the people I hear Stephen talk about all the time. I was  feeling a teensy bit fragile on the Saturday but a wee snooze sorted  me out and all was well. I have to say it was a lovely wedding with some very interesting evening entertainment! I think  Slide 16 will be used to great effect at up coming geek events.  Back home, I have set up a bird bath in the garden, but the birds are either blind, or I should have got the super deluxe jacuzzi one as they are completely ignoring it. Oh well,such is life. My new perennial bed at the front is doing very well and the miniature rhododendrons are a riot of deep purple blooms , so I must be doing something right. This week-end we are off to bonny Scotland -volcanic ash cloud permitting-for the Marykirk annual raft race. Mr and Mrs Wild Bill have opened their doors to an assortment of geeks and SWMBOs -foolish or what? Hoping for good weather but no doubt great fun will be had by all regardless.